There it comes again. A new car passes and a whole truck load of
information processing starts again. Like a program, the front, the A
pillar, profile, B pillar and C and boot or hatch are processed and
analysed. It hardly lasts a second but makes me marvel at the way the
brain functions and continues to repeat this exercise. I keep reasoning
with it that since there are so many new cars coming, its pointless. And
furthermore,my work is not of an automotive disposition. So why? Maybe
in search of closure I began writing this piece.
As I was writing, a lancer overtook my car, naturally, this being
india from the left and at the same time a Skoda overtook the lancer
from its left and immediately, I began imagining the torque graph and
gear ratios at play here. Resigning myself to the fate of my automotive
memories and with general interest at heart I will write only about
design. Of the cars that is.
Growing up in a country that was confused whether it was a socialist
country or not, led to a automotively challenged childhood. The heart
yearns for stuff it does not get, so all sorts of car books were
constantly pored over and the usual suspects overanalysed. Being mumbai,
it was largely a Premier city. Kolkata and Delhi were largely
Ambassador cities and Chennai was where Standard Heralds were made.
The first big car I regularly heard of was the Impala, then the
world's hottest luxury car. Everybody who was anybody had to have one,
otherwise they were not really there. Rajesh Khanna had one. So there.
But my first encounters were with our landlord's what I think was the
Kingsway with its white and acqua two tone colour and big fins, 16
number Ram Uncle's yellow Beetle, and the Landmaster from Ferns Villa.
Also, Owen lived next to Ferns Villa and his dad had a real cool Willys
Station Wagon. Opposite school under Michelle's house was perenially
parked a stately serene black 1966 Mercedes 190 D. The Alves just ahead
in the village had a Herald that was more parked than not. In comparison
our Fiat 1100, the 'dukkar fiat' as it was uncharitably called in
mumbai was quite a commoner in my eyes. There were many others but I
remember these. They all were of different vintages and design
philosophies but in themselves complete. It is the 190 I think that
caused me to go out of whack as far as cars are concerned. Peering over
the window sill looking into the gear knob, the chrome plated rings on
the intrument panels and the lovely vertical grill with the blue and
silver three pointed star decal crowned by the ring.
All through school, newspapers were scoured, magazines torn, posters
collected and scrapbooks made. In this scrapbook is my first drawing of
my car. A no-nonsense four door endowed with a childish yet learned
sense of proportion. We'll call it the X One. More on this later.
The biggest help was the annual issue of World Cars. Every year in
January 100 bucks spent on buying it outside Bandra station. We were in
the 10th then and Shabbir and I would pore over the issue sitting in his
classic Ford Escort.
Uncle, Shabbir's dad would tell us the difference between power and
torque. How a morris minor would have a straight torque line tapering
off only at a very high rpm. Later on one learnt that this is a typical
characteristic of long stroke engines. He was working on a concept that I
still remember. One that I will always remember but not reveal as I
have not tested it. Uncle was not very talkative but a great teacher
when he wanted to be. His garage was a favourite hangout place for me.
And I would often go there to meet Shabbir.
Shabbir and I would often talk in respectful awed tones, me I
suspect more than him about Ferrari, Bertone, Guigiaro, Pininfarina,
Zagato and Gandini. The gods of design. The altar which we longed to
worship at but convinced that we would die in this heathen hell
untouched by divinity.
Time passed in a desultory fashion with insipid ideas floating
around in the heads of indian auto manufacturers. They got a nissan
chery engine in a Lada body and called it 118 NE (Nissan Engined). Why
for heaven's sake can't they get the Chery body also. Die cost saving
cheapos!!!! HM launched the Contessa and the tinpot Trekker. For a while
the government pretended that it was favouring those in high places by
giving them contessas. The Standard auto company launched the the
Standard 2000 a rust bucket from day one with a horribly rattly engine
with no power!!! Indian auto industry dying fast. Before that the
Standard Herald 4 door popped up and popped out faster than you could
say Muthiah!!
The Maruti will not be mentioned but the Dolphin will be as it
suffered at the hands of the govt's policy that blatantly favoured below
800 cc 4 door cars...conveniently only the maruti met that
criteria....Tata's proposal to tie up with Honda for passenger cars was
very much in keeping with the spirit of the Rajiv Gandhi joint venture
era...allwyn nissan, eicher mitsubishi, dcm toyota, birla yamaha et al
were doing well...but of course as they were not competing with Maruti.
Dolphin was. And Tata would be so he was denied. A similar more sordid
story would be repeated with the singapore airlines proposal. Sometimes I
think we should give the group a bharat ratna just for staying put.
I was introduced to Indian Auto Journal then. Rajesh Mirajkar and
his spartan public conveyance and private vehicle designs electrified
me. Concept cars came into my world. Designs seen like never before.
Some time later a new fella left Corvette (I know I know GM) and came
here to design fantastically exotic looking cars. Dilip Chhabria is his
name but his styling while very influenced by Zagato to my mind is not
harmonious. And build quality suspect. So it has remained, despite his
company doing fantastically well.
College meant I would travel easily to churchgate to pick up not
only World Cars but also foreign issues of Car&Driver and
Track&Road. My knowledge was increasing by leaps and bounds. As I
grew interested in other things...India was opening up. Hyundai, Daewoo,
ford, Opel all came in one by one... But where were the Indian
companies? Which brings me to the question I wanted to ask...so I better
come to the point quickly. Let me speed things up.
But after all these years, Tata had created a
Tatamobile. No, not a cell phone. It was india's first attempt at a
pick up truck. Not bad considering the truckers got the looks part
right, they were heavily influenced by the Benz cars they were
assembling for MB. But the build level esp NVH was all wrong. Car
versions came out like crazy. And the one from Nicholas coachbuilders my
favourite. Horrible build quality though. Tata Estate was better but
marginally so. Then came the Tata Sierra. And then Ratan Tata had a
vision to make a people's car. No not the Nano...that would come later.
This was the Indica. And when it was revealed at the Auto Show in
Delhi, it became the first product launch that I saw on TV and cried. So
far it is the only one. Something indescribable when Ratan came on
stage and the car was revealed. guess somewhere there was closure of
sorts. It was a people's car alright. Designed by IDEA. So obviously
there were similarities to the FIAT car of same vintage and dimensions
the Palio, tailgate, boot, hood slope and doors. But the Tatas never got
me the car I wanted. They took an Ambassador sized car and gave it
wheels of a 800. Still make this mistake for all their cars (except the
Safari) and variants. Look at the Manza and the Indigo. Don't give me
engineering and rolling resistance theory, as it doesn't wash. They
could have used thin steel instead of that ton heavy armour plate they
were using, make it lighter so the wheels of proper size could be put in
place. Still am very proud of it but also pissed at tata motors for not
rounding off the job properly. Build and all those habits will come
eventually but styling is something that defines you. And not getting
the proportions right is so wrong.
Mahindras, the chaps who plied us with jeeps of all kinds were
getting into passenger vehicles. It was so exciting. After the
Commander, Armada and Bolero, Project Scorpio is a whole new company
within a company (like GM's Saturn Project) would herald the company's
entry into the passenger segment. Cover stories preceded the launch and
when the car arrived and I was massively underwhelmed. It was a jeep
like any other. Closed yes. But that old Willys Station Wagon had more
character. over the years when I had a few rides in it, I appreciated
the cars solidity and ride. But Mahindra wasn't content...no....no. They
gave us the Xylo and the Gio two of the ugliest vehicles known to man.
Tata tried to compete by giving us the Nano. They have patented the
'too-small a wheel' ugliness and taken it to new levels. So I ask myself
this question...
When indian auto companies make enough money to buy Jaguar and Land
Rover and Ssangyong...can't they buy a little bit of sensibility to
design a better looking vehicle. It doesn't cost more...just need to
make the effort so why aren't they putting it there?
Especially when we are getting the Fortuners, Q7s and the M1s on the
same roads. The Citys and the Ventos on the same parking lots? Why?
Why? Why?
When I an average Indian can see it, why can't they? Why?
I has this question for many years but as it was dormant it lay
still, after seeing what the new Xylo looks like and the ridiculous
honeycomb grille of the XUV500 the torrent became an outpour.